Honest Tea: Green Dragon Tea

Yes, I am doing yet another Honest Tea review, but look forward to another Cascade Ice review soon. ;)
I know what some of you are going to say, and I don't care. Then you are going to say, how did he know that? None of your business. Now you'll say, this guy is kind of a jerk. Agreed. Can we move on now? Thanks.

I picked up this particular Honest beverage on discount. I had to shake it up, being a bit silty from the tea. At first smell, it reminds me of a fruity rolled-up type snack, but the high quality kind, not that crap from General Mills (another mega-food-corp). It's my first time trying this, so I wasn't sure what green tea with passion fruit would taste like. Interesting. There's a moment of sweetness, followed by a slightly bitter and dry taste, and ending with the exotic flavor of the passion fruit.

There is a blurb on the back that basically chastises the sweet tea industry for putting unnecessary amounts of sugar in their teas, noting that 'One teaspoon takes away tea's bitterness. Another adds a nice sweetness. That's where we stop.' And they're true to that, there's only 16 grams of sugar in the 16.9 oz bottle.

I can't say this is one of my favorites, but it was definitely worth trying. It is more of a sipping drink than a chugger, the tea's dryness catches up with you. Not a bad tea, but still not mind blowing.

Ingredients: Purified water, organic cane sugar, organic green tea, organic lemon juice, natural passion fruit flavor, citric acid.

Score: 3 out of 5. I would have enjoyed a little more sweetness than the 'tad.'

*Note: the variety in the plastic bottle is apparently discontinued, but still available in the glass bottle. Look in your local grocer or health-food store.*

Bomba - Original Energy

I successfully avoided the temptation to yank the tab off and throw this before I actually drank it. I purchased this grenade-shaped bottle at my local BigLots, more out of curiosity and amusement than actually hoping I would enjoy it, as I have sworn off energy drinks for well over a year. Also, they tend to not fit our guidelines, so you wont see many of them on here. That being said, this was the ONLY energy drink I found there that contained just sugar, which finally won me over. I found their quirky website (Warning: sexy PG-13 images), and learned BOMBAenergy is located in Austria, so how in the devil a box of these made their way to Utah is strange indeed. Possibly through their Arizona distributor. If you happen to see where these are sold, let me know.

Anyhow, after I resisted tossing this bottle through the window and diving for cover, I took a whiff. Oddly, it smells like Smarties, with a weird cheap-chocolate scent underneath. *shrug* And wouldn't you know it, it tastes like Smarties too. Very sweet and tart, it's also slightly carbonated. I vaguely reminds me of a certain crimson male bovine drink, but not tasting so much like rodent urine.

This small bottle (8.4 ounces) contained a whopping 33 grams of sugar (no HFCS), and excessive amounts of caffeine, taurine and several vitamins. Here's the rest of the contents, even of the bottle itself. I had to stop drinking this less than halfway through, it was just too much sugar for me. Being merely curious, this didn't break my heart too much, and I will never drink another one again.

Score: 5 for clever packaging, 1 for taste and sugar content.

-- WiseGuise

Function: House Call

Pre-Script: Once again, between work and school, my reviews have suffered drastically. I will try to get up at least one a week; I'm hoping we can break the 100 review mark before the end of the year. My apologies, keep reading, and submit suggestions! Thanks, WiseGuise.

I found this at a local retailer of all things dented, damaged, discontinued and bizarre, but it can be found elsewhere, like Albertson's, for around $1.30. After another lengthy stay in my refrigerator, I cracked this open and gave it the usual smell test, which hinted at more of a lemonade than a tea. And then I drank it. Drum roll?

I was a little blown away by this drink after my last encounter with Function, which didn't impress me much flavor-wise. This one is great, it had a sweet, mildly citrus flavor, and a smooth almost milky texture. It was unlike any other 'honey green-tea' I have ever had before. Sugars come in at 24 grams a 16.9 oz bottle, not great, but still not Coke status.
Ingredients & Info.

Although it's a green tea, it is caffeine free, also 'Physician Developed' and packed with more vitamins and antioxidants than an Orange County housewife preparing for her next botox injection. Overall, this has been one of my favorite Function drinks, and I plan on sampling more in the future.

Score: 4.5 out of 5.

-- WiseGuise